Spur of the Moment Suicide Poem

Waking up that morning was supposed to be normal

I wasn’t expecting the conversation to be so formal

Your brother is dead, he shot himself last night

What? Are you kidding me? I asked as I squinted in the light

I sat in silence for I don’t know how long

Was this just a dream? Did I hear them wrong?

The next few hours were just a blur

Until I saw my brother’s son looking so sweet and pure

He was only three and didn’t have a clue

But I lost it when I saw him right out of the blue.

I couldn’t stop crying, I was falling apart

I didn’t say a word; I didn’t know where to start

My brain went numb and I just went through the motion

I had a baby to protect from the commotion

She would never get to know her uncle Brian

But maybe it will save her a lot of cryin

He was such a good person that took a wrong road

I wish I could have helped to lighten his load.

Suicide leaves family with a lot of guilt and sadness

It takes forever to get through the madness.

I have two more brothers that are still alive

I pray for them so they can thrive

My heart goes out to my mother

She lost her son, a pain like no other.

Time will heal all wounds they say

It has been twenty-one years and it still feels like yesterday

All of the feelings are not front and center driving me mad

But they are always there and they always make me sad.

I remember the good things about him and how he made me laugh a lot

When I am sad I look back at those happy memories and they really hit the spot.

So during the day when you’re feeling down

Think of the best times with your loved one and laugh like a clown!

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Prioritizing

This is my big question of the day. We all have different lives, and different ideas as to what is at the top of our priority list, and what is at the bottom. That is a good thing since I think we would all be a little boring if we were all the same.

Some of us work full-time jobs outside the home, have young children and still find time to write. Tell me how you do that. Some of us don’t do anything else but write, and some of us are all over the place and are disorganized and just do whatever we think of in that minute. Which one are you?

Another question for you all. Do you find it easier to stay organized the more busy your life is? I mean, like you are so busy that you have no choice but to be organized right? Either that or you would miss a lot of stuff and be frazzled half of the time. 🙂

I am just curious to all of this because I think that I have been in every situation and am just curious as to how others prioritize. When I worked two jobs and had small children I was never able to get any writing done…at all, which is sad considering all that I had to say back then. ha ha ha

And now, I work from home, my children are older and I do get a lot of writing done, BUT, if my day has an interruption, like an appointment, a volunteer day or whatever, I am completely lost. My little routine is out of whack and I feel dazed and confused. Ok, well, maybe not that bad, but it does mess me up a bit.

I am still putting my writing last though. My family comes first, obviously, then my work and then my writing. The part that confuses me is that my work that I do from home is writing, but writing for others. My writing that I do for myself makes me a heck of a lot more money than my “job” does, so why do I put that higher on my list? I say because it is for someone else and I want to have a good name and all of that, but doesn’t my own writing do the same thing?

Anyway, that is my question for the day. Hearing all of your prioritizing ideas will be great information to have. Thank you!!

I Have Many Opinions…

So, I was talking to my family yesterday and I was asking all of the “usual” author questions. Like, do you think anyone will like this book or is this subject long forgotten and stuff like that. Just second guessing myself every step of the way. But then my husband said something that has had my mind spinning all night long. He said, “Write about the “in” topics if you are worried about it.”

What? I am not writing the news. BORING! (lol) And then he went on to explain that right now a lot of people are interested in the school shootings and bullying and stuff like that. I was mortified. I was not going to write and make money off of such horrific things. That is just awful.

But then he went on to explain a few different things that he meant. And it did make sense. I do have many opinions on some of those subjects. But I am not an expert, per say. So does that give me the right to sell my opinion? I am not big on controversy either and some of my opinions would probably cause quite a stir. Have you ever done that? Do you ignore the nasty comments? I am so up in the air on this. But I do see me doing this, well, at least a few shorter books about my opinions in general, but I am not too sure about to what level I dare go.

Please share your opinion with me on this. Have you written about your opinions before? How did it go? Advice for me?

Thank you!!